worry wart

this little baby in my belly is due to come out sometime in the next 8 weeks or so (for some reason, i am convinced that she will be a little early, maybe that's just cause i already feel so big), and when i stop to think about that, i realize that i'm both totally ready and totally not. on the one hand, 8 weeks seems like forever to have to wait to finally meet her and hold her, smell her, kiss her, love her. but then, i think about all the things that i feel like we have yet to due, and i feel the need to put on the breaks just a bit.

these questions (and more) swirl around my head on a daily basis now:

when will we make that big ol' trip to ikea for things like a CRIB?
when will we decide on + purchase that infant car seat so that we can actually take her home?
when will the weather be nice enough so that we can crack the windows and start painting her room?
for the love of god, there are only a handful of weekends left!

if i didn't know better, i'd say i hadn't done this once before. i feel overwhelmed by things like purchasing a car seat. if any of you readers with infants want to weigh in on this and recommend a brand for me, i would be ever so grateful.

i am aware that she isn't going to know whether her room was filled with a giant welcoming circus upon her arrival just as much as she will be clueless if it remained in its painfully modest state, and that it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, and that most of this is sort of for me at this point in time. but i also know that once she actually gets here, we aren't going to have time to do things like make trips to benjamin moore and have paint mixed, and drive around looking for the perfect dresser and i most likely will not have time to sit down and craft up that duvet cover that i want to make for her. i just want to have some peace of mind and get this stuff taken care of now.

in the meantime, i settle my nerves a bit by obsessively nesting what i can. her clothing is washed, hung, and impeccably folded. and sometimes re-folded. (i did this while waiting for henry, too. it usually involves holding little onsies up and saying to anyone nearby, "look! how tiny! how sweet!" and taking in big lung-filled breaths of the baby laundry scent. do i sound crazy yet?)

also. i am nervous about labor, and i'm not really sure why. last time i had pretty much a perfect textbook experience. quick, and relatively easy and i managed to pull it off naturally. perhaps it is the knowing that's making me a little scared? in this case, surely ignorance must be bliss?

Comments

[louisa]

I've not become a mom yet, Jenny, but I will simply remind you to keep breathing, and tell you that I have all the confidence in the world that 'things' will get done as they need to. You have such a touch, and a way, and you're such a supertastic mom.

Meanwhile, when-oh-when do we get to see photos of your Pregnant Self? (Can I get an amen from others?!)

xo

[Rachel]

Jenny,
We have two young ones and home and I know how you are feeling. All that back and forth, you feel all these things need to be ready, but all that really needs to be ready is a warm and loving home.
I can offer my own personal advice on carseats. We used the Graco snugride with both kids when they were infants until they were 20 lbs.
Now I researched and researched about carseats and tried to go the cheap and safe route and poo-pooed the expensive BRITAX. What a mistake that was. We bought two Evenflos and weren't happy and then we broke down and bought the Britax Marathon. It is pricey but worth it!!! I googled around and found a good deal on a close out color. Our 3 year just went to the ridiculously big Britax Regent because I am such a worry wart and wanted to keep my gal in a five point harness for as long as possible and we moved our son to the marathon. Please don't make the same mistake I made, and just save up and buy the marathon.

Sorry for the lengthy advice, I am just knee deep in it.

BTW, way to go on the natural birth-----I went for the epidural both times. :)
-rachel

[tracy]

just found your blog... {and as a fellow freckled redhead must comment!} your post resonated with memories of our baby #2. it will all get done. or at least the really important stuff will! and i 2nd rachels carseat recommendations...

[becky]

it's easier the second time around i hear.
evenflo all the way. our first, second and third carseats were all evenflo...the second was one that went rear facing to front facing, up to 40 pds...miss chunkalious was one of those not quite 30 pd one year olds....she hit 40 pds when i was not quite ready to put her in just a booster and evenflo makes one that goes from 5 pt. harness to full on booster. and she will point out, has a cupholder!

good luck. we still have our crib if you don't make it to ikea in time....

[kacey]

going from one to two is a big change but so worth it. Your family of three becomes 4 and things are tipped upside down for a while but they smooth out and then you can't imagine anything else. I was more nervous the second time around for childbirth also. I too had a quick first birth and my second was even quicker. If I have third watch out!

[olivia]

i totally know how you are feeling! it's like reading my own thoughts...haha! our little boy is coming in 7 weeks and i am thinking to myself half the time, i wish he was coming tomorrow and the other half...eeek! not to mention being super duper uncomfortable all the time. sigh. anyway...we will be ok! we bought a maxi cosi car seat as it fits our stroller. they are super popular in the uk and europe, but i don't know if they have the in america. i have such a long list of things to buy. overwhelming. it's nice to hear others go through the same thoughts! hang in there chicken x

[Melissa]

I love your blog! Don't worry about not having things done - my boys came early and we didn't get the room done in time. they are now 18 months and i can hardly remember that far back!! As for carseats, we also used the Graco snugride and they are now in the Britax (not sure if it is the marathon or not) My friend has the evenflo and regrets it. Good luck keeping calm :)

[nancy]

oh i hear you. mine is coming any day now and our changing table still hasn't arrived, the pictures are not up on the nursery wall, and well, enough about me... sounds like you've had some good suggestions, but we have the Chico Cortina travel system (carseat, base and snap-in stroller thingy) and of course I haven't had to put an actual baby in it yet, but I really like it and my friends who have had it like it too.

i'm sure all will be wonderful and ready in time, and no matter what it sounds like your little girl will be born into the most perfectly loving environment possible, painted nursery or no!

[Leta]

I'm laughing because i know exactly how you feel! I have a 3 1/2 year old and feel like I have forgotten how to do all of the baby stuff! I'm not due until June, but am already trying not to obsess about it all (where will we put this baby? in a cardboard box??). As for the labor, how could you not be scared? But you have done this before, your body knows exactly what to do. Love that basket of clothes. Sending calming thoughts your way.

[Dawn]

I am right there with you...it is warming up so we can probably paint the room soon. The crib is decided on now we just have to get it. The car seat we are getting is Companion Infant Car Seat
from britax/aqua and black. It can be used with the stroller we got... the Bob Revolution in orange...well our friends got us the stroller and I still can not believe it. Anywho...that's my 2 cents. I am a wreck. I had a horrible first delivery...nothing text book about it and when Memphis was born she did not make a sound for 20 minutes because a special team came in to tend to her...but that's all I will say because now is not the time to swap horror birth stories. I just keep telling myself I did it once and this time it has to be easier and I can do it but I don't really believe myself. I also have had a hard pregnancy. Right now I am sosososso exhausted it's crazy. We too have tooooo many projects to complete in too little time but I know somehow it will all get done and I am sure yours will too. xoxoxo :)

[Melissa]

GIRL! You are right, we are soul sisters this pregnancy! I keep feeling this baby is going to come early. I only have five weeks left, so if she does come early, that is SUPER soon.
Good luck on all your nesting endeavors, just remember after getting them done, the second most important part is posting pictures so your internet friends can ooooh and ahhhh and the cuteness too!

[erica]

i can't help you in the car seat department, but that basket of baby clothing looks so comforting and reassuring. just keep folding and doing what you do (seems like you're doing a darn good job)...

[Jeannie]

I can relate to what you're saying about how all the baby-prep stuff is more for you than it is for your little lady. I felt that way when I was hustling and bustling the month before our daughter was due ... I knew that none of that stuff would make a difference to her, but it felt so essential to my own process of getting ready to be a mother. It was a concrete, tangible way for me to prepare, not to mention a way to physically manifest all the anticipation I was feeling.

I think you are a terrific mother ... and Henry as well as Little Miss Baby-To-Be are lucky to grow up with you!

[Michelle]

Crazy? No way! I did the same thing with the babies laundry. Unfolding, smelling, refolding....I have 4 kids, I did it with all 4!

[Naomi]

Oh Jenny, good luck with everything! I too would love to see pictures of your pregnant self! You must look great. Paint the baby's room ASAP, so it has as much time as possible to air out. Or don't paint it at all. The out-gassing from the chemical stuff is so so difficult for little ones. I recently heard of a non-toxic wall paint from a brand called Milk Paint. Good luck, good luck!!!!

[des]

Don't worry everything will fall into place and once that baby comes nothing else will matter. As far as car seats go I highly recommend the Britax Boulevard (it's good from birth to 6yrs) a little pricey but worth it. BUT the ONE thing I absouluty loved and still use (at 21 months) is my pouch: http://hyenacart.com/momandmecreations/index.php?c=11 its super snuggly!

You'll do great...good luck!

[molliegreene]

i did the folding / refolding thing, too. we didn't get a carseat until the last minute, either. everything that needs to happen will happen in time. best to you . . . can't wait to see your little one!

[lishyloo]

i will look for the baby gear email that alex sent me when i had tru, it's amazing and all the stuff she suggested rules! we have the graco snugride infant seat and now the britax marathon for T-bear. i know exactly how you're feeling with the "how will i get it done." you will and it will be awesome! good thoughts to you!

[Nancy]

Hi Jenny,

I've been a shopper and reader of yours for a while...you sent my oldest girl the cutest dress last year!

I have two girls, 3 & 1. I wanted to chime in right away about your labor nerves. I also had a pretty great first childbirth naturally. I was really empowered by it, and proud of it, and felt all women should know not to fear labor. Think of all the images of childbirth we've seen that are so negative! But, when I was pregnant with my 2nd, all my birthing bravado went away, and I was again really fearful. I shouldn't have been. Labor was truly magical and awesome, and QUICK! It will be much fast for you the 2nd time around, I'm certain. Vote of confidence from me.

xo - nancy

[Lauren Urban]

I HIGHLY recommend the Chicco Keyfit infant seat... I am a certified child seat installer if that makes you feel any better.